if that's ok with you

Most people make the mistake of settling for the wrong person, just because it feels right, at the moment. It does not take a relationship guru to realize it will not last, but still, many take the plunge because it gives them something to do while waiting for the right one. If only we can stop from being stubborn and realize that we prevent ourselves from getting the kind of relationship that we deserve if we occupy ourselves with things that we know will lead nowhere. Even if it is true that you do not need to search because the right one just comes, how can that person find you if a wrong relationship is keeping you from being found?

This is one of several pieces on love a friend wrote in her column back in college. A bunch of maudlin editors we were back then.

But I shouldn't be thinking of such things at the moment. Especially not when I have like a million things on my plate right now.

Like how I shouldn't be thinking of remembering the tiniest details about a fictional character whom we shall name as A for the sake of simplifying sentence structures, or try to see A as often as possible, or do things just for the purpose of being with A. Or be agitated if something goes badly for A. And of course, smile at the slightest rapport with A.

Again, not the right time but it's what I'm good at - diverting my attention towards other things. They're not necessarily ache-free things, but whatever works right?

In support, let me share a conversation which I shall entitle "Major Ass Kissing":

"Hay... Nararamdaman ba natin kung malungkot or in need of some help ang bawa't isa," I asked.

"Hmm... Alam ko when something's wrong. I just don't know... Teka," Striker replied.

"Ano?"

"Nag-ja-jam ang brain ko."

"Kaya mo yan."

"Ayan. I just don't know how to tell if you really are sad kasi you always mask it," he paused and the went on. "The good thing I like about you is you know how to fight off sadness with simple things. And that makes you a simple person."

"Hmm... Ang ganda ng pagkaka-retoke ng boses ni Nicole Scherzinger no?"

"..."

So between the 50-year old lady who gave me foresight of how a Pussycat Doll (pick a Doll, any Doll) would look like in 2028 sans multiple botox, plastic surgery and liposuction treatments (I had the opportunity of sharing a jeepney ride with her yesterday afternoon. Sadness that I can't get a good shot from where I was sitting) and the ever so dreamy A - it's a no-brainer whom I would want to waste precious time daydreaming, saying "3 words, 8 letters. Say it and I'm yours" to.