confessions of a job hopper

Okay. Don't panic. It's just a common question during interviews. I mean how hard could it be? You've been asked that same question on every single interview you've had for the past three years. What makes this one different, right? Besides, if they want me, they'll hire me regardless whether I've had ten, or ten thousand jobs. And of course, they want me. Everybody wants me. Okay, that sounded pretty cocky but whatever. If there's one thing I've learned from interviews is that attitude sells.

"I'm just concerned that you have not stayed with one company for more than a year," she said looking mightily indifferent. If I didn't know any better I would say that she's unimpressed.

"One and a half. Average," I corrected her.

"Convince me why I should hire you."

So she is definitely not impressed. I can't blame her though. It has been a very lousy interview so far. But wait. I am blaming her. I blame her for ruining my mood. I was all set when her secretary called to reschedule the interview. I hate it when that happens. Hiring managers should never, ever assume that the prospective applicant will free up their entire month's calendar just to accommodate a possible, unscheduled interview. Well, maybe some do that. Fresh graduates, perhaps. But not me. My time is precious.

That afternoon, I was at the mall accompanying a friend who needs to return his newly-bought laptop. We went to the shop, appealed to the manager and thirty minutes before 3 PM I was ready to leave when the secretary called to move it again, this time, to 5:30 PM. So I decided to stay. However, the transaction took longer than I expected and it was already a bit past five when we left the store. Taking a cab on a rush hour would be suicidal as it would take twice the amount of time to get to my destination. I pulled out my mobile phone and sent a message to the secretary: "Please tell your boss that I'm running a bit late. Heavy traffic. I'm really sorry. Thank you!" Then I walked. And ran. Slim tie, black shoes and all.

I arrived ten minutes past my supposed-appointment time looking so harassed, and harassed is putting it lightly. At the information counter, I asked for the hiring manager but the kind receptionist informed me that she was still in a meeting. I waited, and then she came twenty minutes after, and then this.

So why would I want to convince her that I'm the best person for the job and that she should hire me? Why would I want to please her when I have several other opportunities, better opportunities I must say, to fall back on? Why?!

"Are you alright," she asked.

Did I fall asleep? "Yes," I replied as I took a moment to compose myself. "Don't misconstrue my myriad work experience as job hopping. All the jobs that I took after my stint as an auditor were offered to me, opportunities handed at the most fortuitous time. I didn't move because I wanted a higher pay, or a promotion. I accepted their offer because I needed it – fresh start, new challenges. I want to keep my passion and learning curve way up. These companies, they didn't write me off when they saw that my tenure never went beyond 18 months. They took me in because they saw that I am a performer, that I exceed expectations. Nowadays, loyalty isn't about the number of years. It's about the delivery. I can give you promises that I won't be leaving, that I will retire here and so on but we both know that it's not true, right? There will always be a better opportunity. But as long as I find no reason to leave, I guarantee that you'll have my loyalty. I can and I will deliver."

She remained quiet for a while, eyeing me until her Blackberry beeped. "Fair enough. Thank you for your time. Our HR will call you in a few days." She closed the interview as she focused her attention to the message she received. I was about to stand up, roll my eyes, and leave the room when she said, "Oh, one more thing. How good are you in Excel?"

It took an eternity, but I got this bagged. Told you it was all about the attitude. And eloquence.

*******

MakMak: I have a new job opportunity. Relocation to Norway.
Striker Rosales: Wow! Go! :)
MakMak: They must have read in my profile that I speak fluent Norwegian.
Striker Rosales: Hahaha. Blonde ambition ito!