"So hindi mo nami-miss Pinas? Mukhang at home ka na sa States ah."
Maybe I am. I really don't know.
I've been away from home, technically living alone, for the past ten days or so. And it is quite surprising that I've managed to last this long without longing for my favorite pillow, or for the hot pan de sal which I usually have for breakfast, or for the nice (-looking) people who populates Ayala Avenue during rush hours. And what's more astounding is that I was able to do some household chores par cleaning - tasks that I haven't had the chance to do until now. I bet my mom would be so proud.
So do I miss Manila?
I believe at some unnoticeable level, I do. That's probably the reason why I said that there's nothing that anchors me back home except for my family. And my friends.
A friend said that I might be in denial that I am homesick. He's probably right. But then again, I don't even know how to define being "in denial".
To me, the idea of missing is analogous to embracing the fear that the [missed] object's presence in one's life might vanish or slip away. Not counting death of course. That's inevitable.
So it doesn't really weird me out that I don't miss my family because I know that they will be there no matter what happens. Likewise, this is applicable to a handful of my friends whom I have spent a better portion of the decade with.
Simply put, I just have faith that neither space nor time will ever break our connection. I don't need proof. I trust them. So yeah, I do not and won't ever miss them.
However, I'm probably still in denial. Perhaps. For something that remains undefined for now. And the more appropriate question would be, does Manila miss me?
I fear to know the answer.
18 comments:
manila misses you? of course. hehehe
but i guess what you feel is really homesickness. :)
Actually, never din ako na homesick buhat ng pagdating ko dito. Ang na miss ko lang yung luto ng Nanay ko. =)
Anyway, it's nice to be independent!
I'm sure Manila (or someone from Manila) misses you! :p
Enjoying much? :)
I like to say it does, but I think it won't.
The Manila that you know, just like many other places that we hold dear in our hearts, will cease to be the same place that we love simply because we loved it because we're there.
Once we leave, while we may miss the place, the place will not miss us back. It simply changes, becomes a place to be loved by somebody else, and moves on.
sang airport ka nagland going to MD? dulles or raegan? miss ko daw bigla ang MD.. hay. missing my first time na nakarating ako ng US. hahahaha
:p
Knowing that (with the available technology around) everyone is just within fingertips indeed lessens the possibility of missing people. But then again, it's been just ten days, so maybe you can blog again on the same subject after one month and we'll see how you're faring. :-)
When I first moved here in Canada, I had a really hard few months.. I missed everyone and everything.. not to say that I don't miss them anymore because I still do. But I find that it was harder for me because I knew that I was staying in Canada permanently. I don't necessarily know if I would have felt less miserable if I knew I was only staying here for a few months and then coming back.. but I supposed I would have.
Maybe it is also because you are enjoying your stay that you don't miss the Philippines yet..?
it's been ten days pa lang naman eh, it's too early to be missing home kasi na-eenjoy mo pa lng yung new experience out there... pero i think its inevitable, darating din ang araw na mamimiss mo pinas kaya enjoy lang haha
@white: Aw. Sana iparamdam naman ng Manila. Ahahaha :P
@coldman: Actually yun din yung una kong hinanap. Back in Manila, I favored American food whenever we dine out pero dito, ewan ko, ang bland ng food.
Namimiss ko ang luto ni Mama.
Thanks sa pagdaan coldman! :)
@princhecha fiona: Ahaha. Thanks for the words of comfort. Lol.
Yep, definitely enjoying my stay. Too much, I'd say.
@jeland: Pessimistic much? :P But yep, what you said is, in a way, true.
Thanks for dropping by.
@david edward: Reagan. :) Ako namimiss ko na din ang US... kahit andito pa ako. Lol.
Thanks for droppin by, man.
@r-yo: Yep, I guess that's one of the reasons why I really don't miss them. Technically I still talk to them everyday. Well, not really everyday but you know.
Yep, I'll probably do that after a few days. :) When I've got nothing better to do here.
@karen: Hey Kar. Akala ko kasama mo family mo jan. Aw. That must be really hard.
Yep, siguro sa isang malamig at malungkot na gabi, mararamadaman ko na lang ang pangungulila.
@odin hood: Aw. Wag naman sana. Ahaha. Mas gusto ko na ako yung nami-miss. Ehehe :P
I have my family with me here in Canada but I miss my friends and relatives... sniff!
@karen: Ahh I see. Well, you can go and visit every once in a while. Yun nga lang medyo expensive pero Carrie Underwood na. Ehehe :)
Post a Comment