resolution: 2009 must-dos

New Year has always been a time not only to look back to the past, but more importantly, it's the best time to look forward to the coming year. It's the perfect moment to reflect on the changes we want and need to make in our lives.

As a child, I remember being terrified of riding roller coasters. I'm far from being a child now but I'm still scared of those damn things though I did try it twice, or thrice. It was exhilarating. It was nerve wracking. Pick an adjective, any adjective. It was even like whoa!

Roller coaster rides are a crazy, messed-up repetitive loops of arcs and dips. By the time you're done, you'll either be screaming for another round as you run back to the line, or yelling curses at the operator as you take a breather at the nearest bench, hopefully one with a nearby garbage can.

Fun may not be the word that every person will use to describe the feeling of riding a roller coaster. However, the single unifying factor that these people can't ever deny is that the ride is totally an experience worth taking, even at least once. It's something to be proud of - you took on that monster and survived.

That's certainly how I felt.

And life's like that - a roller coaster ride. I swear, eight hundred and twenty something years from now, roller coasters will still be considered as one of life's overly used metaphors.

2008 was no different.

I had my ups - I accomplished things that I haven't done before. I was a wanderer, a front liner, and more recently, a bum. I went to places I never imagined I'd step foot on. I learned how rain tastes like in the west. I have waded into the murky waters of some local island. I ate a freaking worm. I felt what it was like to lose myself in the darkness. These made me happy.

And I had my downs - I got too overindulgent and overzealous, breaking body parts like nails and heart in the process. I got my ego repeatedly bruised until it was tender. I lost people, and still losing some, whom I thought mattered. I got tired. I got sick.

But I'm still sick sometimes. I still feel tired occasionally. But at the end of the day I find myself happy. Well, most of the time.

It's true that if you don't get on the ride, you won't experience the adventures. I might still be afraid of the actual machinery but I no longer fear life. It's a crazy, messed-up cycle. I don't even know how I am able to stand it. But it is what it is - I'm twenty something, still counting, and loving every minute of it.

For 2009, I am resolved to find someone willing to join me throughout the entire ride because believe me, it gets real lonely going through those countless loops alone.

It's not too much, is it?